It’s been about 6 months since my last post and I am sorry for that. Maybe if I posted more frequently I wouldn’t have fell off my vegan wagon once again over the holidays.
I debated on publicly posting about this, but I wanted to be honest and maybe help others struggling with the same grief.
I started Veg Power gung-ho on the fact that I would not let the holidays get to me this time. Well, several factors weakened me…money and traditions and hard to please family members being the brunt of it.
I am the predominent cook for Christmas Eve. I have my sisters’ help, but still. It’s hard enough preparing a feast with all of my mother’s favorite recipes than to worry about making vegan versions for just myself on top of it. I don’t have the time or the money, to be honest. Some people think I can just make my mom’s passed down recipes vegan and serve them to the whole family.
Well, you don’t know my family. It would be unacceptable. Even part of me finds it to be disgraceful to ruin her art. I know it seems kind of stupid, but cooking with Mom was a huge part of my childhood. She taught me everything and now that she’s gone — well, changing things so drastically feels wrong.
I could do it for myself and not feel bad. I truly believe my mother would want me to make her recipes my own to suit my lifestyle. But all those family members counting on me to conjure up part of my mother through food would not feel the same. My uncle and brother alone can taste if the dish would be even a pinch of salt off.
So I made a deal with myself…for Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve, I would not be vegan. That deal spread to the days leading up to Thanksgiving and days before and days after Christmas as well. It’s like once I have a taste, I go into a frenzy.
If eating dairy and even some meat weren’t bad enough – I ate pure junk! It’s an addiction, I know. It just adds on to my need to stay vegan, to keep control of my eating habits.
I am happy to say it’s out of my system now. February has me looking toward a bright vegan future. Although, I’m wondering what horrors the holiday season will bring me this year and what I can do to put a stop to it – I can only promise to do the best I can.
Maybe I’ll start a holiday food fund and I’ll just have to make the extra time to cook my vegan dishes alongside my Mom’s recipes. Who knows, maybe if I let my family try – eventually, certain recipes could be substituted. I’m working on mastering Mom’s potato croquettes now…maybe next, I’ll make Chik’n Francese.
If you veggies out there have any hard time stories and words of inspiration to share, by all means, please do…
And the non vegged-folk, I would love to know your thoughts and how willing you’d be to try vegan recipes.
Sandy
Camille said,
February 27, 2010 @ 9:25 pm
Hi Sandy. I think every single vegan falls off the wagon at least once. New Orleans was my downfall. (so sick for a week!) I can understand the family conflict as well. However, I think that you need to cook food that you feel proud of and not cook to please your family. They will give you crap and get over it. Also, your mama doesn’t need you to honor her by keeping her recipes going. You honor her every day by being the awesome, positive, great lady that you are. You are your mom’s best dish and don’t you forget it.
happy vegan cooking,
Camille
vegpower said,
March 1, 2010 @ 4:25 am
Thanks Camille!
That last part made me tear up! You really cheered me up. And I will do my best to honor Mom by making her recipes universal–meaning I am thinking of actually making each one of her recipes into a vegan version. Maybe I’ll even release a cookbook about my journey and experimentation! Thanks again for the comment…we need to go for a vegan night out again soon. There’s a veg-friendly restaurant on Richmond Terrace called Tuttoriso that I would love to try out.
christy said,
March 1, 2010 @ 2:43 am
I understand completely what you are saying about family pressure. It is easy for others to say, “stand by your vegan vow!” but they arent you.
i have been inching my way into vegitarian and veganism for a few years now. I gave up pork about a year and a half ago. I was quickly amazed by how my family acted like i had slapped them in the face because i wouldnt eat a ham sandwitch. Funny enough i started eating turkey bacon years ago and no one said anything about that. This year for christmas my dad made a comment about how he made green beans just for me. I thought this ment he made them w/o bacon. Nope he just cut the bacon slices big enough so i could pick them out. Then was mad at me because i wouldnt eat the green beans. after a while of hearing about it, I ate the stupid green beans.
Later my mom thanked me for giving in, and i was almost more upset by that.
Looking back, I think it was reasonable to my family for me to give up bacon because i needed to lose weight and i told everyone I could not ever just eat one piece of pork bacon. i wanted the whole package.
At the time i explaned it as though bacon was a drug I was addicted to.
Just hang in there and do your best. What else can you do.
vegpower said,
March 1, 2010 @ 4:29 am
Families can be rough…to them, traditional food is like a religion. By not eating meat, it’s like we’re committing a cardinal sin. I am fairly lucky though — my siblings are pretty supportive. Even my aunt has come around a bit
It’s just Christmas Eve that really is the hard part…because that’s when it comes down to veganism effecting their traditional foods.
Anyway – I hope your family shows you more support…and I don’t just mean making dishes that you can “pick” the meat out of!
Thanks for the comment